alot happened at work today.
everything was stupidly funny.

first got this famous chinese actor went
into the restaurant. then jing jing became
all giggly. haha. okay fine. he was cute.
then she asked me to follow her take picture
with him which i did. she was so happy. haha.

then while i was doing my work, atiqah kept
tickling my butt. haha. idiot.

and james (the one who makes lemon and salt
drink) kept trying to scare me. haha. it
didn't work. and when i asked him to watch
out, he said i'll be waiting. hahaha.
retarded.

there are more stupid things that happened
but i'm lazy to explain. but i felt like
shit the whole time. yeah, whatever.

you rest your tiny head on your pillow,
nurul.

hellooooo.

it was funny at work just now.
while i was checking the restaurant's
setting, my colleague used the blender
to make smoothie or something.
then finally he came out of the kitchen
with two glasses of ice blended drink
looking so happy. haha. he gave one to me
and asked me to try. so i tried and i got
the shock of my life. okay, i am exaggarating.
but the drink tasted like...i don't know. =p

he puts in lemon and salt in the drink!
what do you expect? haha. retarded.

oh and there's this one thing. shitshitshit.
i swear i don't know what's wrong with me.

i wanna sleep forever. please.
nurul.

i couldn't sleep yesterday so i called hilya
at 3am. haha. we talked till 6.30am. =P

oh, it's either hilya's a psychic or she just
knows me well. haha. she knew who my
previous post was meant for before i even
told her. haha, okay.

you know i'll let you in. oh, kelsey.
nurul.

hellooooo.

okay, um.
i don't know what you're trying to show me.
and i am abit scared cause i don't know what
lies ahead. but i just hope it's for the best.

~
Found myself today.
Oh, I found myself and ran away.
Something pulled me back.
Voice of reason I forgot I had.
All I know is you're not here to say,
What you always used to say.
But it's written in the sky tonight.

So I won't give up.
No, I won't break down.
Sooner than it seems life turns around.
And I will be strong,
Even if it all goes wrong.
When I'm standing in the
dark I'll still believe.
Someone's watching over me.

haha. it's one of the songs that kept
playing at my workplace.
so it's stuck in my head. =D

i won't be afraid to follow everywhere it's taking me,
nurul.

heyyy. i accidentally woke up and now i
can't go back to sleep.
IT'S 5 PLUS IN THE MORNING FOR GOD'S SAKE.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME? hahaha. okay.
aiyah, i don't have proper sleep timings
nowadays. not that i don't want to sleep
properly. i just can't. sometimes now is
the time i go to sleep. so yeah,

anyway, yesterday i was so bored i decided
to iron my clothes in the closet but i got
lazy. so i learned songs and watched movies
online! i didn't know it was that fun! heh.
okay, i need to get a life.

holy mother of cow. there's this man under
my block. he kept clapping his hands so
loud. he looks cuckoo.

oh! i got a job babyyy. just like that. =)
i asked yesterday and i'm starting work at
4pm today. i won't tell where it is. but
it's at a restaurant lah. what? come on.
what were you expecting? hahah.

okay. mommy's waking up any minute now. i
gotta pretend to be asleep.

sometimes everything's gonna fall right into place,
nurul.

went to bugis cause atiqah wanna surprise
her boyfriend. and then we walk around and
then daddy got his bad mood so i had to go
home. whatever. i didn't even have time to
look for job. haha.

anyway, i'm liking this song ALOT.


if the heart is always searching, can you ever find a home?
nurul.

i'm displeased. i wanna punch any stranger
that comes in the way. i know my reason of
being peeved is stupid but i can't help it.
hilya, nadia and jamie will roll their eyes
if i tell them why i'm feeling this way. heh.
i'm not really mad, mind you. it's just yeah,
heh. whatever nurul.

anyway, i was bored so i asked qilah whether
i sounded dumb at my previous post. haha.
and the conversation was something like this,

nurul: do i sound stupid at my last post?
qilah: no you don't.
nurul: really?
qilah: yeah. you sounded like nurul.

-.- thanks qilah. that was so enlightening.
haha.

oh shit. jonas brothers are on mtv now. i
didn't know they're adorable. i like the lead
singer and the curly haired one. =)

oh, i sorta miss my long hair. okay,

i want to know how it feels like to wear a real
victorian dress.
nurul.

p.s. hilya, you can take the swings. i changed
my mind. i want the boat in the lake. heh.
okay, i should just keep quiet.

um. okay. i wanna say a few things here.
it's whatever i'm feeling at the moment.
so yeah,

i realised one thing. i've been trying to
run away. run away from things. i've been
avoiding my thoughts. it's good but it's
only for the moment. but if i face and
accept it, i will be able to move on. so
that's what i'm gonna do. i just need time.

everyday for the past one week, i will go
out and meet up with friends or do something
like even go to the library with my little
sister to take my mind off things. then
reality hits me hard when i read your email.
it made me realise how badly i miss you. then
something made me read your blog. and, it was
too much for me to take.

i can't stop crying. yeah, i cry. so what people.
everytime i stopped crying, a familiar song
played in my playlist and i will be reminded
of you. then i will quickly try to change the
song. but yeah, i already am reminded. so like
no point. =/

and it's not just songs. sometimes the things
people do. the things you gave. or the places
we went. or even just looking up to the sky
at night and there are stars.
i feel empty.

anyway, here's one song that kept playing
in my mind. it's part of it only. i don't
think many knows this song but yeah,
I never wanted you to leave,
I wanted you to stay here holding me.
I miss you,
I miss your smile.
And I still shed a tear every once in a while.
And even though it's different now,
You're still here somehow.
My heart won't let you go.
And I need you to know,
I miss you.

people say to love does not mean to have.
now i understand what they mean. =)

anyway, enough of my sad story. heh.
i watched 27 dresses with hilya and nadia.
it is a cute chick flick. =D
oh, and did i tell you that my hair is red? hee.
not red, red. it's dark red. but yeah, red.
i dyed red-brown together with nads at first,
but then i decided to change. :p and i cut my
hair short! i was bored of my long hair.
it was so... um, long. heh.
hilya dyed her hair red too. it's kinda orangey
red but it looks good on her. so yeah, =)

time has got a way of taking back everything you thought you had,
nurul.

p.s. a message to you if you're reading
this post. you know who you are. =)
the BIG SURPRISE was BIG and you wore
the red shoes! and you said MOMENTUM
when it's supposed to be MEMENTO.
:p hahaha. yeah, okay. =)